The Bryans.

Ciao.

2009-08-30T23:45:00.001+08:00

I'm saying my goodbye.
I'm not gonna blog anymore.

Bye, ahymnoflove.blogspot.com!
R.I.P.

Your ride, best trip.

2009-08-29T19:08:00.003+08:00

Turn the lights off, carry me home.

Whatever.
I don't care about anything, anymore.
I'm sick of everything.

I am running away from reality, as fast as I could. And trying not to look back, so as to prevent my eyes from tearing.

I want a new life.

Birthdays.

2009-08-28T19:05:00.006+08:00

Okay. Today is indeed a special day.
You know why?
Cause 6 of my friends are born this day.

August 28th.
I'll name them :

Spencer Joseph Sta Maria.

Danny boy!
As known as Danny Chan Wai Keong.

Kar Lei.

And a few person which I don't have a picture with.
I'll list them.

Hans.
Shaman.
James Ho.

Happy birthday, mates!

Have a blast!

:).

Tonight.

2009-08-27T23:04:00.004+08:00

What matters most?
Everything!

Hello!

My day was awesome. Mark the word "awesome".

:D.

I was up all night with Joanne on Msn till 6 am.

Turned out, I slept till12 noon.
Headed to Sunway Pyramid with mom.
She's been talking off days for the past 2 days just to accompany me.
Had a lot of laugh out loud conversations with my mom.

Hah.
That's about it.
:D.

Hello, lky.
I'm so happy to text you once again.

The stars are holding you tonight.

2009-08-26T01:44:00.006+08:00

Hong Kong Disneyland 07'.

I miss Disneylands, man!

Hahaaa.
I'll blog about yesterday, August 25.
I'm elaborating it like how you write in your English examination - everything detailed.

I woke up without a digital alarm clock by 8 am.
I had someone whacking me up with a cane.
Besides my mom, would else could it be?
Haaahaa.

Yeah. It is because of my tuition class, I would wake up so early during school holidays.
Oh. It was accounts tuition class at 9 am.
Had a quick breakfast.
Siew Fai picked me up first followed by Yi Han.
Tuition all the way till 10:30.

Siew Fai then drove us to Mid Valley.
There were 4 of us in the car.
Siew Fai, Yi Han, Choi Yee and myself.
Destination reached. We were hunting around for food. Brunch, actually.
We walked without directions and ended up in the Garden's foodcourt.

Deon Nicholas and Sheng Qin came.
Followed by Nicholas and Chee Chao.
Had a hard time at GSC deciding what movie to watch.
Ended up buying UP.
It's quite a nice movie, by the way.

Hah. Then killed our time at Brewball.
Met Bernadette. And this was our conversation.

*waves
Bernadette :" Hello. Want some ciggies?"
Myself :" LOL. WTF. You just said hi and the next thing you did was offerering me ciggies".

Damn chun.

Gah. I'm lazy to continue this.
I'll continue when I feel like I want to.

Oh, by the way, I'm not using my cell phone for a day.
In case of emergency, call my house phone in the morning.
And call my mom's number in the afternoon. I'll be out with her.
And like I said, in case of emergency.

Goodnight, people!

The girl.

2009-08-24T00:00:00.005+08:00

Happy birthday, girl!

Have an awesome one.
Best wishes throughout the year!
You have my back, always.

Ps : It's only physically, but know that you will be on my mind 24-hours at a time.

Just so you know..
No, you won't know it.
I love you, Carmen Lee Khar Yann.

Pick me up.

2009-08-23T15:12:00.005+08:00

Last night was a boom.
Imagine 6 person inside a car and none of us have a license.

HAHAAA!

Oh, thank you, Luke, for your car.
:D.

Gotta run.
It's a busy Sunday for me.
Tonight is gonna be another boom, hopefully.
:D.

Edited by 11:28 pm.

Oh. Fuck my mom, man!
She wasted my time from 9 am - 7 pm.

And thanks to her, I can't go out tonight.
What the fuck is wrong with me going out during night?
It's not like I'm gonna study at home, right?
Go and fuck a wall!

Try listening to FM Static - Tonight.

It tears me up inside to see you.

2009-08-22T17:12:00.004+08:00

Colonel Sanders, thanks for inventing cheesy wedges!

:D.

So, it's Saturday today.
Holidays are up.
Hopefully, it's gonna be a boom.

Oh. I've got a good news.
I'm changing for good.

I smoked my last weed.
I took my last cigarette.
I did my last sin.
I'm sleeping earlier than before.
I'm going back to church.
I'm gonna study hard for final term.

But, I think I'm not gonna stop shisha.

Hah. Support me, will you?

Oh. I'm going for Thru' the Roof 3.

Mainly because I wanna be holy.
:D.

Dear Maria.

2009-08-20T18:19:00.004+08:00

Tuesdays.
:)

Somehow, I teared in school today, after a long long long long time.

Thank you Ms. Yuen very very much.

:'(.

Bleed.

2009-08-17T19:51:00.003+08:00

My dad was a sexy stripper.

Hahaaaa. Found this picture out when I was looking back at my photo album.
My dad is cool, eh. :D.

Oh.
I could still smell grape-peach aroma around my body.
The shisha smell just stick there. And it smells good.

So, I slept at 4:30 am and woke up at 6 am.

Went to school.
Practically did nothing.
Wasn't in class for the whole day.
Teachers weren't around.

Lunch with Yi Han @ Old Town.

Went for BM tuition class.

Steven's Corner for cheese naan with Siew Fai.

Then here I am, home.

Hahaaaa.

I've done everything to move on like I'm supposed to.. but.. I still.. miss you.

Ocala.

2009-08-16T02:57:00.002+08:00

Fuck you.

Screw life!
I hate life.
Fuck everything!
Fuck a wall, people!

Fuck it, fuck you!

Marijuana.

2009-08-15T04:36:00.002+08:00

Forget love.

Hello, people!
It's currently 4:36 am.
:)

I just love today. You know why?
Cause it rained and it made the whether super cooling.
It's a melancholy occasion, but a beautiful one.

Skipped school because I was sick. Woke up at 11 am.
And the next thing I did was switching on my computer.

After I got bored of using my computer, I rang Kavin up for stoning session.
And you know what? He ran out of stock.
Gahhh. Fuck!
Called Mark for back up. Turned out, he has no stock, too.
So, we decided to go to Nathan's Corner for dinner and smoke up some ciggies there.

Went back home. Played some mastermind game at the lobby.
And stone, stone, stone.
Jevin came. Offered us free shisha including transportation. But Kavin rejected.
We changed it to tonight.

:)

I'm currently listening to A Whole New World from Disney's Aladdin Soundtrack.
And you know what? I miss Disney Lands!
Especially the one in LA.

:(

Ohh. I miss Aussie, too!
:(((

Joints, baby!

2009-08-12T17:50:00.005+08:00

I have no time to blog.
:(

But, do expect a post tomorrow!

One request - love me back.

2009-08-09T21:18:00.005+08:00

Weed weed weed!

Good shit.
I don't think I'll ever attend church again if I keep on sleeping late on Saturdays.

Lord, please forgive me.

So, woke up.
Bathe, then headed to Jalan Ampang for piano hunting.
Found 2 good and nice U2's.

But, here's the trick.

I found a white piano and a black one which both equally cost RM 5800.
I'd prefer the sound quality of the black one. But I have always wanted a white piano.

I'm in a dilemma.

Quality or colour?

Arghh..

:S

Joint.

2009-08-08T22:52:00.004+08:00

It feels like joy and it feels like pain, it feels like sunshine, feels like rain.

It's an excuse for dying, a reason to live. And if you don't know, that's what love is.

Weed simply rocks.
I mean pure weed without a single tobacco grass.

Anyone in with me?

:D.

So basically, I'm still stone after 9 hours I took weed.

As far as I could remember, I went to Mid Valley in my stoning mode around 6 pm.
It was a farewell dinner with Eve @ Dragon-i, Cititel.
There were 6 of us, namely Nikki, Per Li, Ying Nan, Henry and myself.

Had a great day at Brewball.
Now, I do see Per Li's true monkey face.
The girls left. Ying Nan left, too.
So the remaining ones - Henry and myself went to Starbucks for supper.

Ps : Eve, all the best at United Kingdom. I'll miss you.

Oh yeah.
A birthday wish.

Happy birthday, Su May.

:D.

Sometimes a goodbye is a painful way to say "I love you".

2009-08-06T22:57:00.002+08:00

Everyone hates to suffer from pain. Cause it destroys, sometimes it kills. Seldom do we realize that pain is always the breaking of the shell that encloses our understanding, leads us to learning and molds us to become the best person we can be and I will continue to paint a smile on my face though reality hurts. Like the way I continue to live for my dreams of being with you again though hope seems nowhere to be felt.

You can't and you won't see the pain I feel.

I’m slowly getting closure.

2009-08-05T16:12:00.004+08:00

And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.

I lost my pencil case a few weeks back.
I have all my drawings, quotes and love shits in it.
:((.
Loaning pencils and pens around is something which I personally dislike doing so.
But I got over it by buying myself a new pencil case.

Hah.

Today's mamak session after class was much merriment.
Let me label you the sluts of the day.

Henry, Teck Fai, Monie, Clarissa and myself.

Awesome people with fucked up brains.
Fucked up brains produce awesomeness.
Awesomeness leads to creativity.
Creativity bursts into pervert jokes and actions.

Oh Your God!
Budak-budak zaman ini.

Everything that matters breaks in two.

2009-08-03T22:36:00.005+08:00

Icons : A, B, C, D, Bitchfucker, Eiffel Tower, Nike and Butterfly.

Like what Zu Yi said.
I am very happy to know that there are actually some human beings living on this planet Earth, whom has the same mind as me.

Bitchfucker shall remain her post.
No one can change a single thing.

Butterfly, welcome the future without worrying.
Whatever belongs to you, will always be yours.

What can I do?
Say it's true,
oh everything that matters breaks in two.
Say it's true,
I'll never ask for anyone but you.
Another Heart Calls - The All American Rejects.

Respect boundaries.

2009-08-02T12:06:00.005+08:00

Currently addicted to Terlalu Istimewa - Adibah Noor.

Shit.
I skipped church, again.
Oh my God and oh your God.

I'm going to hunt for a white piano in the afternoon.

Edited.

Ahhh.. White piano hunting sucked.
I've been traveling all around town looking for a reconditioned piano.
But so far, the only white reconditioned piano I can find is in Subang Jaya.
It costs 10.5 K.
Anyone wants to sponsor me?
:(.

Ps : Mom, I want that white piano, pretty please?

Please?
Please?
Please?
I beg you, please?

Oh, I dropped by grandma's place to give her a warm hug.

My dai ga jie, wei!

:D.

Tagged.

2009-08-01T23:11:00.006+08:00

By Ai Mee.
ABC's share RULES :
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to copy-paste this note, and answer all the questions.
At the end, choose 10 people to be tagged - including the person who tagged you.

ABC About You
Questions :

A - Available: M.A.B. Married but available.
B - BIRTHDAY: It's a secret. (:
C - CRUSHING ON: Jesus.
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: Sprite.
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO : Yee Sim.
F - FAVOURITE SONG: Half Alive - Secondhand Serenade.
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: I'll take both.
H - HOMETOWN: Penang, Australia, the States and Kuala Lumpur.
I- IN LOVE WITH : White pianos.
J - JUGGLE: Butterfly knives.
K - KILLED SOMEONE: Yet to come.
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE : Can't recall.
M - MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: Chocolate.
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 1.
O - ONE WISH: To be a pilot.
P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: Fanchette.
R - REASON TO SMILE: I spot a shit on your face.
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: Stay Close Don't Go - Secondhand Serenade.
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 11.00 am. Bloody mom. Arghh!
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR/PATTERN: What the fuck? Oh. It's pink and it's a G-string.
V - VEGETABLE(S): I don't eat vegetable.
W - WORST HABIT: Addictions.
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: Twice.
Y - YOYOS ARE: For small kids.
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: I don't know?

Random Questions About You

Spell your name without vowels: MrcsBrynSmZHrn.
What color do you wear most?: White and black.
Least favorite color?: Depends
What are you listening to?: Right here - Staind.
Are you happy with your life right now?: Yeah.
What is your favorite class in school?: 3A4 08'.
When do you start back at school/college?: Beginning of the year?
Less favourite pair of shoes?: Don't have any.
Where do you wish you were right now?: Heaven.

THE CAN'S:

Can you dance?: Yes.
Can you tie a cherry stem with you mouth?: I don't think so.
Can you whistle?: Yes.
Write with both hands?: Yeah.
Walk with your toes curled?: I'll break my leg.

THE DO'S:

Do you believe there is life on other planets?: Yeah.
Do you believe in miracles?: Yes.
Do you believe in magic?: I do for the spiritual one.
Love at first sight?: HAHAAA!
Do you believe in Satan?: Satan as in devil?
Do you believe in Santa?: Yeap.
Do you know how to swim?: Yeap.
Do you like roller coasters?: Very much.
Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows?: It depends.

THE HAVE'S:

Have you ever been on a plane?: Yeah.
Have you ever asked someone out?: Yeah.
Have you ever been asked out by someone?: Yeah.
Have you ever been to the ocean?: Yeah.
Have you ever painted your nails?: Yeah.

THE WHATS:

What is the temperature outside?: Quite cooling.
What radio station do you listen to?: Hitz and Fly.
What was the last restaurant you ate at?: KFC.
What was the last thing you bought?: Cigarettes.
What was the last thing on TV you watched?: 24.

THE WHOS:
Who was the last person you IM'd?: Soledad.
Who was the last person you took a picture of?: Yi Han.
Who was the last person you said I love you to?: My mom.

CRYING SECTION:

Ever really cried your heart out?: Yeah
Ever cried yourself to sleep?: Yeap.
Ever cried on your friend's shoulder?: Yeah.
Ever cried over the opposite sex?: Yeah.
Do you cry when you get an injury?: Nah.
Do certain songs make you cry?: Yes.
Are you a happy person?: Yes.
What can make you happy?: When I spot shit on your face.
Do you wish you were happier?: Definitely.
Can music make you happy?: No really.

LOVE SECTION:

How many times have you had your heart broken?: I lost count.
Have you ever loved someone so much that you'd die for them?: Yes. But they won't realise it.

LOOK AT ME.
What is your current hair color?: Black.
Current piercings?: 0.
Have any tattoos?: Soon.
Eye color?: Black?

IN A BOY/GIRL:
Favourite eye colour?: Anything.
Short or long hair: As long as she has a kind heart.
Height: As long as she is shorter than me.
Best clothing: Clothe-less. HAAAHAA!

HAVE YOU EVER:

Been to jail: Yes.
Laughed so hard you cried?: Yes.
Cried in school: Form 1.
Thrown up in a store: Nah.
Done something really stupid that you still laugh at today: A lot.
Gone skinny dipping: Nope.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke but I'd prefer Diet Coke.
McDonald's or Burger King: McDonald's!
Single or Group Dates: Anything.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate.
Strawberries or Blueberries: Neither.
Meat or Veggies: Meat.
TV or Movie: Movie.
Guitar or Drums?: Both.
Adidas or Nike: Nike.
Chinese or Mexican: Chinese.
Cheerios or Corn Flakes: Cheerios!
Cake or Pie: Pie.

I tag :

1. You.
2. You.
3. You.
4. You.
5. You.
6. You.
7. You.
8. You.
9. You.
10. You!

Glue and prayer.

2009-08-01T01:04:00.003+08:00

Designing can be fun at times, especially with shoes. (:

I wanna share something which I personally think, is fun.

Bill and I was skipping class and loitering around school today.
So, while walking by the prefect's room, Janice crossed Bill's mind and he decided to look for her in the prefect's room.

So, this was what happened :

*opens door..

Bill :"Is Janice here yet?"
*and out of nowhere..
this boy replied :"Oh Janice! That one with the big boobs!"

So, Bill and I was laughing our guts loud.
And I decided to dig out his name and class.

The guy was Rodney Francis.
From class 2A2.

After my class and meetings, Deeban and I decided to look out for that guy.
Deeban fucked him down.
And for your information, he was half of Deeban's height.
Deeban said something which lead him to tears.

Deeban :"If you ever dare to say Janice has big boobs, again, I'm gonna make sure I dig up your boobs."

He teared immediately he went into class.

HAHAHAAAAA!

Deeban did most of the gangster talk while I was sitting there watching his dry shorts turning wet.
Serve you right for being such a slut!
Poor little boy, learned your lesson, huh?

:)

July is over.
Half a year is gone.

It seems like July is the season for coupling.
Everyone's not single like I am, anymore.
:(

I'm here, single and sad.
Hah. I'm not keen or whatsoever.
I don't need any girlfriend at the moment.
I'm quite content with my life right now.

Ps : You're the only thing it would hurt to lose.

Sigh of relief.

2009-07-30T22:23:00.003+08:00

What a sigh of relief it is, indeed.
I feel free now.

Like totally free!

Thank God the whole settlement went well.
:)))))).

Cause the truths always hurt.

2009-07-28T17:51:00.004+08:00

"Time will prove it all. " -- Yee Sim.

Perhaps, time will prove how much I've been hurt by you.

Remember yesterday - Cause I love you.
Remember today - Cause you will never ever love me.
Remember tomorrow - Cause I will still always love you.

Credits.

2009-07-27T16:51:00.003+08:00

A special thanks to Joanne Lim for the new blog skin.
She's always been my blog skin changer.

Starbucks and movie tickets.
Affirmative!

Thank you, girl!
You rock!

Perhaps.

2009-07-26T23:48:00.007+08:00

Remember when I asked you to stay and be loyal so that one day he will see your love and be touched?
I was actually hoping that you will see mine.

Lky, Ilysfm!

Tagged.

2009-07-25T13:37:00.006+08:00

Tagged by Aimee.

1.) Name five people you've talked to today?
Janice, Khaw, Aimee, mom, dad, grandma, maid.

2.) Is anything wrong with your eyes?
Nope.

3.) Color blind?
A little? Not too sure.

4.) Do you ever write notes on your hand?
At times.

5.) Last time you cried?
2 days ago.

6.) Do you cry when you get an injury?
Nope.

7.) Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?
I don't even know my middle name.

8.) Last movie you watched?
Harry Potter.

9.) Where did you sleep last night?
My bed.

10.) Where is your phone?
In front of me.

11.)When is the last time you were in a swimming pool?
Last week.

12.) Have you ever fallen backwards on a chair?
Yeah.

13.) Are you happy right now?
I don't know.

14.) What do you feel like watching?
I wanna watch how the world ends.

15.) Who starred in your last dream?
Can't recall.

16.) Have you ever gone Christmas caroling?
Yes! A lot of time. And I get paid for doing so.

17.) Is there someone on your mind that shouldn't be?
Nope. They should be.

18.) Whats an obsession you have?
Cooking the phone.

19.) How many pillows do you sleep with?
One.

20.) Has anyone ever sang to you?
A lot.

21.) Do you feel comfortable getting up and giving speeches?
Kinda.

22.) Have you ever passed out on the bathroom floor?
Nah.

23.) What are you drinking right now?
Chicken rice's soup.

24.) When's your birthday?
It's a secret.

25.) Who were the last people you hung out with?
Cell group mates.

26.) What are you wearing right now?
Singlet and basketball jersey shorts.

27.) Have you ever been awake for 48 hours?
Yeah.

28.) How's the weather?
The sun was shinning on my butt this morning, too. HAH!

29.) Do you like the color grey?
Not really.

30.) Do you think you're old?
Nope. Not at all! :P.

31.) What are you looking forward to in the next month?
To settle the police case.

32.) When is the last time you talked to number 1 on your top friends?
2 days ago, I think.

33.) Have you told anybody you loved them today?
My parents and my grandma.

34.) Who do you trust with EVERYTHING?
God and Yee Sim.

35.) Sometimes, do you wish you were someone else?
At times, I do.

36.) Have you ever told anyone you were OK when you really weren't?
Plenty of times.

37.) Do you think anyone in general out there loves you?
My close friends.

38.) What is one thing you miss about your past?
My hair.
_____________________________________________

1. The person who tag you is
BALLS.

2.Your relationship with him/her is
Dog-and-owner ship.

3. Your five three impressions of him/her
She listens to my orders well.
She is one good bitch.
She bites.
She lols.
She sucks!

HAHAAAA!

l4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you
She kissed my ass.

5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you

"Thanks bugger , for the sincere apology which ..
I didn't need !
Seriously , You don't have to feel guilty for anything or
what-so-ever. I understand it's because
you're having a really hard time in life. & the Good News is ,
Janice is here ! To lend my ears to you ,
and to pray for you :D"

6. If he/she become your lover, you will...
Love her and feed her well.

7. If he/she become your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be
Sell more balls.

8. If he/she become your enemy, you will...
Make more white flags for her!

9. If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be...
Her mom?

10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her is...
Teach her how not to say "lol" that often.

11. Your overall impression for him/her is...
3 F's.
Fair, fat and failure (loser!)

12.The characteristic you love most about yourself
I am myself.

13. The characteristic you hate most about yourself
Being myself.

14. The most ideal person you want to be is
God.

15. For people who care and love you, say something to them
Kiss me, baby! I'm contagious.

Pass this quiz to 10 people who you want to know how they feel about you.

I tag :

1. Whosoever
2. who
3. thinks
4. this
5. post
6. is
7. interesting
8. and
9. wants
10. to do it.

Even "fuck" wouldn't describe how I feel.

2009-07-23T13:24:00.005+08:00

Nothing could ever change it back.
Once it's done, it's done.
There's no way of changing your criminal records.
I can't find a word to describe it.

I just hope that you guys do appreciate what I bear.

I'm gonna burst, soon.

Ps : No guts, no police; ada guts, ada criminal record.

Comptines d'un autre été.

2009-06-07T03:12:00.006+08:00

I nearly, nearly died on Friday night.

A shout out to my Korean/ scandal/ part-time girlfriend, Chan Pei Hui :

Happy birthday!

Friends are angels whom help you to fly, when your wings forget how to fly.

Ps : I miss you. And I hate you for breaking Mr. Tam's heart! Boo you! You suck!

Bottles.

2009-06-04T18:46:00.006+08:00

Cheers.

Miserable people.

Lost Generation.

2009-06-01T04:13:00.001+08:00

1 word : I'm speechless!

Wanna know how to kill me? Tell me that you don't love me.

2009-05-28T21:52:00.013+08:00

I'm stopping my blog.
Yes, for the moment. Or for ever, perhaps?
I don't know.

So here's why I'm stopping my blog.

The main reason is because I don't want to care anymore.
I don't want to check for comments or stuffs on my chat box.
I don't want to hope for money from Nuffnang.
I don't care about the publicity.
And the truth is, I started this blog for someone.
But as for now, since the hope is gone, there is no more meaning for me to continue my blog.
I used to put so much hope in getting her back and I'm sick of it.

And plus, there are things around me that I do care and I would rather give attention to.

Anyways, I'm not too sure about this.
I might be changing my mind tomorrow.
God knows.

Meanwhile, take good care, people!
Godspeed.
Bounce.

All that I had, was love.

To give and express.
To a soul so lovely, whom I loved,
but love someone else.
Time will eat up my love.

Liberty!

2009-05-27T23:43:00.006+08:00

Black and white.

PHEWWW!

Letting go of examination's pressures.
Examinations are finally over!
Rejoice, people!

It's a sad thing that I've just realized how much I've lost during this mid-term examination.

Time kills, a lot.

So really, appreciate every second you have.

Cause there will never be an "us".

2009-05-24T15:08:00.004+08:00

Your words felt like a knife.

Play me a song of my heartache.
Cause I promise you, I'll know every song..

Tu me manques.

2009-05-20T19:37:00.009+08:00

When you put an ice under heat of the sun, slowly it melts.
When you put yourself under the pain, an eye shed tears.

我睁开双眼看著空白

读完了依赖，我很快就离开..

I'm for you; but you're just not for me.

2009-05-19T01:37:00.008+08:00

And I got the point that I should leave you alone.
But we both know that I'm not that strong..

Il n'y a qu'un bonheur dans la vie, c'est d'aimer et d'être aimé.

:)

Loving someone you can't be with.

2009-05-17T02:23:00.009+08:00

Just a short update.
It's 3 am. And I'm wide awake.

So heart-breakingly beautiful.

Love is NOT to be shared between two people. One is severely hurt and the other is content. It NEVER satisfies both.

I love you.
But you love him.
So, what's left for me to say?
In conclusion, it hurts..

I'm not living this life.

2009-05-14T14:48:00.002+08:00

I died today.

At 3:27 am.

Will probably resurrect after May.

Ps : Anything, leave a message in my chat box.

"It doesn't matter how long you've had it, all that matters is knowing you had it, once in your life." -- © Yee Sim.

Yee Sim, thank you very much, for everything, and I'm sure you know what I mean.
:)

For now, I just need some time to find myself back..

Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.

2009-05-13T14:16:00.026+08:00

I was sleeping with River Flows in You - Yiruma last night.
Got up with a neck ache.
Had to skip class cause I could barely turn my neck.

Since I have the free time now.
I'll post up some pictures which I wanted to post quite a long time ago.

Tsk tsk.
Creative people - Sher-Min.

My class' bulletin board.
Bill as Buddha.
My mates.

Credits to Wei Sen.

Melissa Kong.

Joke of the year :
V-Hong as nerd.

Melvin's.

Mine.

Jo-Lynn.

Gahh. I have too many pictures until I don't even know how to rename them.

Shedding away the pain I am, of my soul. The soul which died long back, with not even pain to be felt anymore, since my pain and soul was you.

Game's over.

So, wake up!

It's just not me anymore.

2009-05-12T17:33:00.006+08:00

First of all.
I wanna post a birthday shout out to..

Lydia Wong!
Happy birthday, girl!

Ps : We love your DSLR. :D.

Somehow, something really strikes me last night.
My mom reported to me regarding the death of Uncle Mah.

R.I.P

Enjoy your stay in heaven.
I will meet you there one day.

I'm off to fencing.
Hooroo!

You are every reason, every hope and every dream I ever had and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we were together was the best day of my life.

1 week.

2009-05-11T17:09:00.004+08:00

I really never thought that you'd remember it.
For the first time in my life, I teared over something because I was happy.
:)

See!

Even shoes do smile.

Arghh. I woke up with an ache in my neck today.
It stops my neck from being able to move to my right side.
And I looked like a disabled person in school today.
Especially when someone calls me, I'd have to turn my whole body around to answer them.
And just so you know, it looks extremely retarded.
Gaahhh.

Remember my words?

Till the sun grows cold,
and the starts grow old..
I'll love you for this life time.

Mom.

2009-05-10T16:43:00.002+08:00

Okay.
I know you're gonna take the cane and chase me around the house if you see this.

I just want to wish you a very Happy Mother's Day.

I'll let this be your one man show.
:D.

I love you, mom!

Even though we seldom see each other, but we still do talk on the phone.
Even though you have work to do and I have studies to do, I still do love you.
You are always my mom. Nothing can ever change that.

Even though you are not around today, I still want to wish you a very Happy Mother's Day!

You! Yes, you!

2009-05-09T22:38:00.008+08:00

"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under the trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of water or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time." -- John Lubbock.

Man. I miss my mates and my hometown.
=(.

Will we be always, always?

2009-05-08T15:50:00.008+08:00

"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world." -- George Bernard Shaw.

Bill's lame birthday presentation.

Just for fun.
The lamer!

I'm slipping off the edge.

2009-05-07T15:57:00.003+08:00

"There comes a time in life when you have to choose between what's easy and what's right." -- Reuben Kee.

Something profound I found on Yee Sim's blog :

Why tears?
Cause fears.

10 subjects to cover within 10 days time.
Examinations suck.

The night goes on as I'm loving you..

Tagged.

2009-05-06T16:50:00.003+08:00

By Yee Sim.

1. Besides your lips , where is the favourite spot to get kissed ?
My cheek and my ears.

2. How did you feel when you woke up this morning ?
Quite excited.

3. Who was the last person / people you took a photo with ?
My mom.

4. Would you consider yourself spoiled ?
Spoiled as in?

5. Will you ever donate blood ?
Yeap.

6. Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex ?
Yes. YEE SIM!

7. Do you want someone to be dead ?
The devil.

8. What does your last text message say ?
"Okay. But I don't have any cigarettes with me."

9. What are you thinking right now ?
Sleep.

1o. Do you want someone to be with you right now ?
Yeah. My mom.

11. What was the time you went to bed last night ?
1 am ++.

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing now ?
Didn't bought it. I got it free from my dad.

13. Is someone on your mind right now ?
:)

14. Who was the last person who text you ?
Henry.

TEN Lucky Person to do this quiz...

1. Sher Min
2. Pei Hui
3. Blake
4. Kelvin OOOOII! :D.
5. Wei Ann
6. Melanie
7. Deon
8. Carmen
9. Chooi Yee
10. Deseree

15. Who is no.2 having a relationship with ?
Tam Chun Jen!

16. Is no.3 a male or a female ?
Male.

17. If no.7 and no.1 get together , would it be a good?
No. End of the world. HAHAA!

18. What is no.1 studying about ?
Her comics.

19. When was the last time you chatted with them ?
Mostly, everyday.

20.Is no.4 single ?
Unfortunately, yes.
HAHAHAA!

21. Say something about no.2 .
My Korean girlfriend.

22. What do you think about no.3 & no.6 being together ?
Wooot! :D. Can give it a try!

23. Describe no.9 .
Er.. My friend?

24. What will you do if no.6 and no.7 fight ?
Watch and cheer. HAHAA!

25. Do you like 8 ?
Nope.

Smile for May 04, 2009.

2009-05-04T16:27:00.008+08:00

00:30.

"Two hearts,
two minds,
in time,
did find,
one love,
one aim,
two paths,
the same."
-- © Marcus Bryan Sim.

Thank you.
Very much.

Just so you know,

ilyvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvsssssssssfm.

Love truth, and pardon error.

2009-05-03T14:19:00.013+08:00

Went to my new house at Cheras Mahkota on Labour's Day.

Oldies.

Moon.

I'm shifting soon and guess what?
I don't like my new house. Not a single bit.
It's a 3 story terrace house.
It takes around 45 minutes from my current place to my new house.
So, I'll be driving to school daily, next year.
:D.

Oh. I'm not gonna blog about Lee Hom's concert.
Cause I have got nothing to blog about. I just love his songs.
Thanks to my dad for all the tickets.
Was kinda forced by my mom to go.

Birthday shout out to :

Lim Chan Chung.
Commonly known as LCC or KLCC.

He was the first one who came up to me and say hi when I first transferred to Sri Sentosa.
Super friendly guy. Full with sense of humour.
Happy birthday, mate!

"In the last analysis, love is only the reflection of a person's own worthiness from other persons." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson.

God, just a little more time, please?

I have loved life.

2009-05-02T14:05:00.006+08:00

Therefore, I shall have no sorrows to die with.

I'm praying hard.

Wishing that my medical report wasn't true.

It won't be soon before long.

2009-04-30T16:57:00.006+08:00

First of all.
A very happy birthday to..

Henry Tan.

Treat you 1 King size tonight.

Had fun at Jeya's math tuition last night.

"Underwear. Panties. T-pad." -- Henry.

Ohh. I skipped history class today.
Just to have a little sex-talk with xx.
:O.
Now, I understand more what sex means from a girl's point of view.

And I was laughing hard last night, by watching this video.

You'll get it if you were there.

Darn freaking funny.

也许
是我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生..

I’ve lick my wounds but I can't ever see 'em getting better.

2009-04-29T17:45:00.004+08:00

Lily Allen - Fuck you.

Yes. Fuck you Mbszh!

My heartstrings.

2009-04-28T17:26:00.004+08:00

Okay. I'm bored.
So, I'll show you guys my guitar.
:D.

Ladies and gentle men, I present you my darling.
*applause*

I'm off to fencing.
Hooroo!
Hahaa.

It's just beyond me. I cannot carry the weight of a heavy world..
I'm.. sorry.

Just leave me.

2009-04-26T13:46:00.008+08:00

Hello, mates!
I woke up by 2 phone calls today. Bill and mom called at the same time.
And what the hell are you people doing so early in the morning?!
I'm tired.. After 14 hours of sleep.
Anyways, I've got too much of new pictures in my computer.
And I don't even know how to rename them.

Mamak hang out before tuition.

Candid 1.

Candid 2.

Yoke slurp.
Hahaaa.

So, it's Sunday. And it is indeed, a sun day.
It's freaking shinny out there.
Skipped church cause my oldies aren't at home.
Home, is the best place to be when oldies aren't around.
:D.

A shout out to Low Ji Hong.

Happy birthday, bro!
Study more, man!
You've been a great friend, a nice colleague, an out-going hang out partner and my pool teacher.
Enjoy your day!

I guess that's all I want to blog about.
Good day ahead, people!

I've got nothing to do with you, anymore.

And the one thing I learned from you is.. love hurts.

2009-04-25T23:14:00.009+08:00

See the colors which is out of the heart-shape?
That's what I mean when I tell you that I love you.
It is simply.. more than words.

It's okay. You don't have to like me back.
Just don't chase me off. I still want to love you.

Don't take your love away, please.

2009-04-24T17:08:00.008+08:00

If success is a hard way to go, I'd just give it up.
Screw education!

So what if you are the smartest person on Earth?
And same goes to so what if you are the stupidest person on Earth?

SO WHAT?!

Just so you know, it's impossible to have all smart people in this world.
Cause you need the existence of stupid people to prove yourself smart.
Yeah. I'm stupid. I got the last in class. And I give a damn, not.
I suck big time. Subjects are the killers.

FUCK IT!

Ahh.. By the way, I love Lily Allen's new album.

It's Not Me, It's You.

Recommended songs :
1. Fuck You.
2. The Fear.
3. Not Fair.

Fencing competition - Selangor League 2 in Shah Alam tomorrow.
Wish me luck.

Is it too late to save it?
Just so you know..
It hurts to see it fade away.

Clky.

2009-04-22T18:13:00.003+08:00

Ohh my my.

Yi Han told me that Vivian Lau stalked at us at the park yesterday.
:O
I'm so speechless.

Those awkward butt-shaking moments.

OMG!

Awkward shit!

Baby, I'm sure that you know I could give up everything just for you.

Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over. I wish that I could take it back. But it's over.

2009-04-21T17:27:00.021+08:00

Okay. This is my usual Tuesday.
Had a blast in school.
Finally ate something cheap for lunch instead of Pizza Hut, KFC, Mc Donalds and Old Town.
Loitered around with the usual people at Pn. Mazni's park cause we were early for account's tuition.

The orang gilas.

The sex-machine.

We sang the Doremon song and did the "big walk" thing like how Doremon did.
:D.

Siew Fai :" Marcus, look! Hot chic!"
Marcus :"WHOOOA!"
*saliva drips.

Monkey bars.

Sleeping ugly.

Poser no. 1!

Poser no. 2!

Model no. 3!
:D.

The sweet sweet sweet couple.

A moment of confession.
AWWWWWW la.
They look so sweet together, right?!

I'm super lazy to do touch-ups and copyright those pictures.
So, please understand and respect.

I had a great day.
:D.

I'm so jealous cause I'm already married.
My wife controls my life.
:(.
Boooo you!

So, the stroy goes.

2009-04-20T01:23:00.012+08:00

This, is, for you :

And now you see.
And now you feel.
How much it hurts.
To know the truth.
Like what you've did before.
You'll get in return.
Cause what comes around, always, goes around.

I'm not revenging.
I'm just being myself.
Yeah, I always suck.
So?
That's just me.
I'm just bored.
It's not a mistake.
生命，本来就是一个错误。
And don't worry, I won't bother you anymore.
But, I'll be the greatest fan of your life.

My words, you have 'em all.

--------

Once in every lifetime there's a chance to stand apart.
We can show the world our very best, reveal what's in our heart.

Glory never will end!

Champions aren't made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them - a desire, a dream, a vision.

Shit!
Now I'ma focus more.

Edit.
Hello, people.
I'm currently at Ying Nan's house.
Giving Henry and Ying Nan drum lesson.
Hah.
Skipped class today.
Reached school by 7:15 am.
Met up with the humans at the mamak stall beside my school.
And out of no where, 2 prefects came out of the school. Somehow, we caught their attention. They were walking towards us and we got alerted and ciao immediately without even paying. Wai Lok didn't manage to run. I'm sorry, man.
Ran like shit. Was having fun along the whole escape-journey.
Kong Weng got a sudden attack from stray dogs. HAHAHAA!
Everyone laughed like shit.

Tiring day.
*inhale, exhale*

Because I know my words so you can keep that drama I don't want it anymore.

2009-04-19T13:15:00.004+08:00

Yeow!
Man. I miss using my computer.
It's been 2 freaking hectic days for me.

I got home by 7 pm on Friday after class.
Slept immediately after I showered till 8 am on Saturday. Skipped dinner.

Woke up at 8 am.
Went fencing from 1030 - 1230.
Went to Bill's house.
Went to Mid.
Went for a birthday celebration, Brew, dinner and movie.
Reached home by 12 midnight.

I've been out from 8 am till 12 midnight.
:D.

Cooked the phone with Sim till 0130.
And sleep.

"Living life itself, is already a huge mistake made by human beings." -- Shinjuku Incident.

I'm truly sorry.

One day, maybe one day, you will realize how much you mean to me.
And how much I still do love you.
But, I'd prefer things to go the way you like. And the answer is beyond obvious.

I'm out.
I'm tired.
Ps : Henry, I just realized that the 5 sleeping pills don't work for me.

I want to sleep now.
Good day ahead, people!

Thanks for trying all these while.
Thank you.
Take care, my mate.

Song Xian Wern.

2009-04-17T03:08:00.008+08:00

It's 3:08 ante meridiem right now.
I'm wide awake.
Thanks to Friendster.

Guess what I've found while surfing around Friendster?
Angeline's profile!
I called Yee Sim up, immediately.
Sim, I don't freaking care if you are sleeping like a dinosaur or a gorilla. All I know is that I need to talk to you. You witnessed my past.

Love. Vengeance.

I'm breathing faster than before.
Memories are rushing through my blood.
Words that are left unsaid, has lost its value.

Scars that are left are getting deeper and deeper.
And I don't know why, I hate you as much as I love you.

You are my heart killer.

My first love.

It has been 3 years since we broke up.
You moved on, I stayed, remember?
I tired to move on in Australia. But, things got worse. I dreamt about you there.
For ever was my word.
And I guess that I must have really meant it.

It's been 3.
I'm hoping to see you again.
I know I screwed up the ending part.
I'm sorry.
I really am.

And if you are reading this, I do really hope that you'll forgive me.
I know you've been avoiding me.
But, I've been searching for you all these years.
Collecting news from Taman Desa and stuffs.
But, where are you? :(
Remember Mentos?
I still keep them in good condition.

Just so you know, I miss you badly..

Ohh. By the way, happy birthday Kharenee Koh!
*my hugs and kisses have been sent through the wind. Inhale and you will feel it.
Ps : Our dirty big secrets. Shhh!

Okay. It's 4 sharp now. Gotta sleep. Sentosa Idol audition tomorrow!

Triple M.L.

Melvin, Michelle, Marcus and Lydia.

Goodnight Earthlings!
Goodnight, Xian Wern.

Because some secrets are meant to be shared.

2009-04-16T15:02:00.018+08:00

Okay. I had this super what-the-fuck conversation with Lawrence last night.
My Msn's personal message was : I need good memories. :(.
And he pop up out of no where and..

-Ławr€nc€- says:
aw
-Ławr€nc€- says:
aint the times you spent with me good enough? /hehe
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
LOL!
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
WTF.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
HAHAHA!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
after all the nite we've spent together..
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Well, it was actually quite enough for me.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
doing each other..
-Ławr€nc€- says:
>_<
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
And all the blow jobs.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
yeah!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
you know its not easy handling your juice! hrmph
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
You know, I still remember strawberry flavour.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
be grateful! those were good times!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
wtffff hahahaah
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
It was my all-time-favourite.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Too bad yours was short.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Mine was long.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
lollllllllll
-Ławr€nc€- says:
wtfffff
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I'm so gonna blog about this, man!
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
HAHAHAAA!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
hahaha
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
How've you been, man?
-Ławr€nc€- says:
horny as ever
-Ławr€nc€- says:
xD
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
LOL!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
ahahah
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I bet my ass you are still 1 horny little virgin, right?
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
HAHA!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
hahah yea im a virgin
-Ławr€nc€- says:
and im horny alryt
-Ławr€nc€- says:
xD
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Haahaaa.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Dude, why are you still 1?
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Shouldn't you be like fucking girls tonight or something?
-Ławr€nc€- says:
lol
-Ławr€nc€- says:
im goin after a gal la
-Ławr€nc€- says:
you? got gf?
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Plenty.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
:D.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
wtf
-Ławr€nc€- says:
hahaah
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I even have sex partners.
-Ławr€nc€- says:
serious?!
-Ławr€nc€- says:
you've had sex??
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
HAHAAAA!

Etc etc.

Anyways, went over to Yi Han's place with Siew Fai yesterday to finish up the pictures for our moral project or so called kerja "amal".
It was more like a kerja camwhore.
I feel so like a poser, man!

Pose.
Posers.
Mr. Ass.

Hahaa. Nice hair cut by the dicipline teacher.
She was just posing, like me.
Ms. Hole.
Mr. Ass and Ms. Hole made me pose this.
Lala~
Haarrrlo, my name izsh mArCUs.
:D
Pose until siao then sendiri laugh pulak.

And if you are wondering why are we doing project at night time.
I would say you are a good observer.
Thanks to Mr. Ass for his procrastination.
We were supposed to meet up at Ms. Hole's house by 6 pm.
And Mr. Ass came at 7:45 pm. So, I had to skip my tuition class.

And today suck!

I wanna scream : FUCK!

Ps : Grandma, get crunk!

And I wanna cry now..

Sometimes, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairytale to tell.

2009-04-15T15:15:00.002+08:00

"I love you and that's all I really know." -- Swift.

Yes. All I really know is that my heart loves you more than anything else I could desire for.
I love you. But I won't say it, because I'm scared that you won't say it back.

Imy,
Clky.

Joke only for true Malaysians.

2009-04-13T15:04:00.003+08:00

I got this mail from Jacklyn.
And it makes sense.

When Dr. Mahathir was Prime Minister of Malaysia.

One lousy day in the middle of the economic crisis, PM Mahathir was feeling extremely frustrated and wondering how a neighboring country can be doing better than Malaysia.

One of his aides said, I head that the leaders consult Fen Shui masters to ensure prosperity for the country. DR Mahathir thought if that was the case, Malaysia Bomoh also can, and went to seek the top Bomoh's advice in the country.

After reviewing the case, the bomoh told DR Mahathir that there were 2 things he must do.

Bomoh : Step 1. You must blame the crisis on SOROS for everything.
DR M : But, why?
Bomoh : Because SOROH stands for 'Speculate On Ringgit Or Stocks'. You must blame him, and look at the ways to control the ringgit and stock market.

Bomoh : Step 2. You mist get rid of Anwar.
DR M : What?! Why him?

Bomoh : Because Anwar stands for 'A Nation Without Any Ringgit'.
DR M : But how? This is difficult to do, he is popular with the people.

Bomoh : Aiyoh! You damn bodoh lah! Look at your name, Mahathir.

Make Anwar Homosexual And Then Highlight It Repeatedly.

This one lagi best. The latest according to the trend.
Mahathir stands for :
Must
Always
Hantam
Abdullah
Till
He
Is
Removed

Laugh people! HAHAAA!

When you've reached the end, what else is there?

2009-04-11T15:47:00.002+08:00

Is there love?
Is there hope?
Is there chance?
Is there forgiveness?
Is there turning back?
Is there guiltiness which kills you?
Is there anyone else who still cares?

Ladies and gentlemen, often in life, we do screw up.
But, I have got good news.
Jesus is alive!
He is real!

May I invite you, my blog readers to join this event.
I know I'm posting this a little late.
But, I do really hope that you may come tonight.
It's at Putra Stadium, Bukit Jalil. 8 pm.

I was there last night. And it was SUPER awesome.
Trust me when I say super.

And when the Earth fades, falls from my eyes.
And You stand before me.

Happy Easter to all Christians out there!

He is alive!

I'm falling more for you, baby. More.

2009-04-10T23:22:00.015+08:00

Exhausted.
Slept in school today.
Too tired. Thank God I had the chance to skip the last few periods for Good Friday's performance.
Didn't sleep at all last night.
Was raising my phone bill with some ass.

The biatch whom snatched my note book.
And cried after what she had done.

The best joker.

Shawty, get crunk!
My all time favorite scandal partner - Kar Mun!
Gates.

Lydia!
She was snapping at people's ass.
:O
And in return, I smacked her ass.
:D
Face-to-side.
Credits to Lydia.

Watch this video, all you who understands Cantonese.
Damn freaking funny.

My body moves but my heart will stay.

2009-04-09T19:14:00.004+08:00

The only reason you won't let go of what is making you sad is because it was the only thing that made you happy.

True, people?

I will wait.
I will.
Slowly,
gently,
for you to move on.

And time, is all I ask for time..

Consuming fire fan into flame. A passion for Your name.

2009-04-08T16:58:00.005+08:00

Don't get disappointed when God doesn't give you what you want.
For He knows the best time for you to have it.

*I banged my head on the wall* and forgot what happen this week.

Matthew 11:28-30.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Spirit of God, fall in this place.

Lord have your way,
Lord have your way with me.

Oh.
Fencing pictures :

Coach Janice.
I forgot why I was laughing so happily.
:S

Coach Annie. Hahaa.

FULL ATTIRE!

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D.

And I injured one of my fencing mate.
I feel guilty, man.
:/

Drinking.

2009-04-06T18:28:00.003+08:00

"Sexy. He. Is. To-be." -- © Mbszh.
I think I am having serious problem in drinking.
And I don't know why.
Little can't satisfy me.
Much makes me lose myself.
How?

Okay.
Brewball from 12 noon till 5 pm today.
Try playing foos with pool ball, it's super fun.
And it is FREE. Hahaa. Just steal one pool ball and that's it.
My first time was with Jason, Rain, Eddie, Jasper, Nick and Wei Jie.
Laughed like shit.

Okay. Random post.
Hooroo, people!

Edit :

Somehow, something I wanna tell you.
I don't wanna text this whole thing to you cause you'll get mixed message.
After everything that have happened, I thank you for everything. Thanks.

With all things good.

May your joys,
like the stars at night,
be too numerous to count.

May your victories,
be more abundant than all grains of sand,
on all the beaches,
on all the oceans,
in the world.

May lack and struggle,
only serve to make you stronger.
And may beauty, order and abundance,
be your constant companions.

May every pathway you choose,
lead to that which is pure and good and lovely.

May every doubt and fear,
be replaced by a deep abiding trust as you observe evidence of a higher power all around you.
And when there is only darkness,
and the storms of life are closing in,
may the light at the core of your being,
illuminate the world.

May you always be aware that you are loved beyond measure,
and may you be willing to love unconditionally in return.

May you always feel protected and cradled in the arms of God,
like the cherished child you are.

And when you are tempted to judge,
may you be reminded that we are all one,
and that every thought you think,
reverberates across the universe touching everyone and everything.

And when you are tempted to hold back,
may you remember that love flows best when it flows freely.

And it is in giving that we receive the greatest gift.

May you always have music and laughter.
And may a rainbow follow every storm.

May gladness wash away every disappointment.
May joy dissolve every sorrow.

And may love ease every pain.
May every wound bring wisdom and may every trial bring triumph.

And with each passing day, may you live more abundantly than the day before.
:)

This is my heartfelt wish, for you.
Yes, you! I love you!

Scream "die Shady" and pop it.

2009-04-05T13:56:00.005+08:00

Sometimes I wonder why I fell in love with you in the first place, and continue to love you even after all the pain. And then you smile at me and I realize why; without you.. I can't breathe.

I was being asked by a 6 six year old friend of mine.
After witnessing a horrible cat-and-mouse fight.
The mouse died. And he was crying like shit.

Somehow, he asked me something deep, which really got my brain squeezing for that answer.
He asked :"Is every human gonna die in the end?" I nodded my head.
And he got more curious and asked the second question :"Then, what is the purpose of living life if we are still gonna die in the end?". A six year old child questioning questions regarding life and death.
I was quite shocked. I have no idea how to explain to a child about education regarding life and death.

And suddenly, I recalled how Australians taught their child to look at life and death.

During winters, oldies will bring their children out for making-snowman-session.
They will decorate it with everything they have to make it look good.
And of course, children loves it.
When night comes, after their children goes to bed, oldies will light some wood just right beside the snowman. Slowly, the snowman melts.
In the morning, when their children wakes up, the first thing they will do is to check out the snowman.
And you could see the tears in their eyes when they know that the snowman isn't there anymore.

And every oldies will tell their children :"In this world, there are chances of losing the things that you like. And that includes the snowman." They do cry after listening. Then again, their oldies will tell them :"The snowman will melt into water, and when there's sun, water will turn to water vapours, and it will goes up to the sky. And in the winters to come, snow will drop again. It's like we (oldies) and you. We (oldies) might die one day, but life has a purpose for you to continue on." And that makes it clear for the children to understand.

Death is something we all must face.
Nothing goes the way we like.
When you look at something you really like as a gift, it is a miracle because you own it.
In the end, when you reminisce, your gratefulness will weight more than your sadness.

It's just my life opinion.
No offence to anyone of you out there.
It's just my personal view of life.

And every word is typed by me. I did not copy and paste from the net.
Respect me and I will respect you.
Thank you. :)

I love although I fear.

2009-04-04T16:01:00.002+08:00

I seek redemption for this heartbreak I suffer.
The venom, lethal enough to paralyze.
Flows through my veins with a vengeance.
As my heart whimpers it's last heartbeat.
*shhh..*
Listen.
"I.. love.. you".

My iTunes were playing in shuffle mode this morning.
Somehow, a sentence from the lyric hit me when "Where is the love - Black Eyed Peas" was being played.
Part of the lyric :

"If you never know truth then you never know love".

Problem is, if I know the truth, I will never know what is love.
Cause the truth is you will never love me, right?
Ahh.. Geez.
I'm feeling so sick.
I wanna live without brain cause my brain is aching badly.
Curse you, headache!

Later, people.

I walked around with a limp. Cause loving you almost killed me.

2009-04-03T22:41:00.007+08:00

I don't know if I was ever loved by you, but thanks for trying all those times.

Went for Cross Road @ downtown today.
It was quite fun. You can see the effort they put in doing the maze.
Good job!
Dropped by Mid Valley for Fast and Furious 4 with Benjamin.
It was not that nice as I had expected.
Rating : 4/10.
Ben was quite worried because it was classified as an "18+" movie.
But as usual, you know me la. Always the man. I would look for my Indian smoking mates.

Okay. I'm super duper tired today.
Need to sleep now.
Good night, darlings!

A guiltless twisted lie. It made me learn to hate myself for letting it pass by.

2009-04-02T15:16:00.009+08:00

"I will love you" is much greater than just "I love you". It has the future in it.

I've just found out the pure meaning of my Chinese name.
Thanks to my ex-official Chinese teacher, Pn. Chong.
She checked the dictionary during recess today and proved to me the true meaning of my name.

Profound :

楚桁. It means that I'm clear and stable with my base and foundation.

Picture credits to Wei Jan.
Thanks, Jan! You the woman! C:

Goodbye? Hello? Isn't it just the same cause in the end, I'm still gonna go back to you.

2009-04-01T15:59:00.007+08:00

If I could be anything in the world, I'd choose to be yours for ever.

Drafted on April 1.
Published on April 2.

2009-03-31T17:44:00.002+08:00

Had a 1 hour and 5 minutes heart-talk with my best mate last night.
I opened up everything and it feels quite cool by doing it.
And thank you for lending me your ears, Yee Sim. :)

"You know the killer but you can't tell who's the killer. And the person will end up telling the killer. And I will be the person." --©Yee Sim.

Fank you for the statement and all that you've taught me!
And yes, I trust in your plan. 1 more month. I can endure.

I'm gonna reset all my priorities from now on.
No one holds my life expect for me.

School was fun today. Especially during physics class.
Laughed like hell.
Lunch @ Pizza Hut with Siew Fai and his mom.
Account tuition class was quite fun, too.
I did understand much better than the few classes I had before.

And I just got home.
Just done taking my shower.
And here I am, in front of my comp.

I'm tired.
Tuesday's always been hectic for me.

Okay. I got to go now.
Fencing class.
Getting my full attire today! Can't wait.
Wheee! :D:D.

While you have your agenda, a life to pursue.

2009-03-30T11:27:00.004+08:00

"You will be the kite and I will be your kite string. I'm letting you fly away and be free but I'll always hold onto you and be your base in case the wind doesn't blow strong enough."

No class today.
Was supposed to get my debit card but thanks to my mom for not waking me up.
Cheeee byeee. Now I'm bored.
Okay. I hate my fucking biatch grandma.

If I say goodbye and begin to walk away because of what I believe is best for me, will you care enough to chase after me and prove me wrong? Will you?

Someone's big day.

2009-03-28T19:47:00.006+08:00

It's someone big day today.
And that someone is big.
And important to me.
Without her, I won't be here on the planet.

So,

Happy birthday, mommy!

I love you!
Always have, always will.

When we were in Aussie. Hahaaa.
That's the only nice picture I have with you.

I know sometimes I do cross the limit, but I love my life.
And I don't blame you for screwing me up quite a lot of times. Hahaa.
I still do love you. :D

Oh. Who's in for Earth Hour?
Siew Fai suggested that we hold a barbecue party.
Haaa.

ily, clky. I still do!

2009-03-27T21:19:00.004+08:00

"Forget logic and listen to your heart. If I didn't truly love you then why am I still here?"

Oh, spot KL Tower and KLCC in that picture? =)
I need a DSLR, man! =S

For fuck's sake.

2009-03-26T12:34:00.010+08:00

"You'll only see my shadows, cause my true face will disappoint you." --Mbszh.

I'm currently at home skipping class.
Couldn't catch a single breath last night.
Oh, man. Addictions suck.

Anyways, woke up at 10 plus.
And as usual, I'll look at KL.

See the emptiness between the clouds?

Had a conversation with my mom few nights back.
And somehow she said something really profound. (Which she usually doesn't.)
She just changed my aspects of life.
Thank you, mom.

School has started.
Results came out.
I suck big time.
Subjects are the killers.
I felt like failure by not studying.

And now I am freezing right here wondering why should I study.
Finally I came out with a few reasons why I should study.

1. I hated sleep.
2. I hated bored-ness.
3. I wanted to pay for my sins.
4. I had enjoyed my life enough.
5. I hated being the last in class.
6. I couldn't live without tension.
7. I wanted to take revenge on myself.
8. I wanted to make God and my family proud.
9. Everything in life has a reason; I wanted to prove it wrong.
10. I believed in the Bhagwad Geeta principle : Study kao kao, don't care about results.
11. I wanted to achieve, to complete, to accomplish, to surpass my goals, to prove people wrong, to prove myself worthy.

Hahaa. Screw it. Alright. And for you freaks who got good results, go and get your dick rubbed.

Oh, by the way, I wanna thank Chee How for this nice gift.

I've no idea why you bought it for me but thanks, man!

Okay. Let's talk about music.
I've been looking throughout the whole freaking Malaysia for Secondhand Serenade's first album - Awake. But I still couldn't find it.

Wanted badly.

Okay. I actually took a few hours to write this post.
Hope you people enjoy reading this random and boring post. =D
Ciao, people.

Tagged.

2009-03-25T16:36:00.010+08:00

Tagged by Melanie.

I've Tagged:
A
N
Y
B
O
D
Y
WHO
WANTS
TO DO THIS.

1. What have you been doing recently?
Breathing? Cracking? Smoking? And heart-aching.

2. Do you ever turn your cell phone off?
Yeap. When I don't feel like communicating with anyone.

3. What happened at 10.00 a.m. today?
Recess in school.

4. When did you last cry?
That night.

5. Believe in fate/destiny?
Yeap.

6. What do you want in your life right now?
Self destruction. I don't wanna live anymore.

7. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood?
It's always in my school bag.

8. What is your favourite thing to have on your bed?
My phones and my speaker?

9. What bottom are you wearing now?
Shorts.

10. What does the nicest text in your inbox say?
"You gonna go sleep d? Haha. I love you :)".

11. Do you tend to make a relationship complicated?
Absolutely not!

12. Are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone?
Not borrowed. But it's given by my bro. :)

13. What was the last movie you caught?
Race To Witch Mountain.

14. What are you proud of?
Being a loser?

15. What does the oldest text message in your inbox say?
"Bill Summary:
Current Bill (07/08/08) : RM 301.31 (due 06/09/08)
Balance b/f (overdue): RM 88.35.
Amount payable: RM 301.33."

16. What was the last song you sang out loud?
Secondhand Serenade - Stranger.

17. Do you have any nicknames?
Mbszh.

18. What does your last text message say?
"Are you going for fencing tonight?"

19. What time did you go to bed last night?
12 something.

20. Are you currently happy?
Yes. Not at all, actually.

21. Who gives you the best advice?
Yee Sim and my grandma.

22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can?
YES! :D.

23. Who did you talk to on the phone last night?
Melanie.

24. Is anyone bugging you right now?
Nope.

25. What/ who was the last person to make you laugh?
My grandma.

26. Do you wear toe socks?
Ye!

27. Who was the last person you missed a call from?
I don't miss call people. I just call them.

28. Have you ever had your heartbroken?
Yea.

29. What annoys you the most in a person?
When they are being very quite.

30. Do you have a crush on anyone?
Nope. Not crush. Deep love.

31. Have you done cocaine?
Nice question. :)

32. What is the colour of your room?
Gray.

33. Would you kill someone you hate for a billion dollars?
No!

34. Do you believe in the saying : Talk is cheap?
Depends on the situation.

35. Who was the last person to lie on your bed?
Julian.

36. Who was the last person to hug you?
Karr Man.

37. Did anyone see the last person you kissed?
Never kissed a girl before.

38. Do you have a life?
I wish I don't.

39. Have you thought of someone dying, when they're really still alive?
Yes.

40. What is the reason behind your profile song?
I don't have any.

41. Who is the last person you saw in your dream?
Can't recall.

42. Last time you SMILED?
A few minutes ago.

43. Have you changed this year?
Yeah.

44. What are you listening to now?
Secondhand Serenade - Stranger.

45. Are you talking to someone while doing this?
My grandma.

46. Is there a quote you live by?
Yeap. It's a quote on my desk.
"Not everything that can be counted counts; and not everything that counts can be counted" - Albert Einstein.

47. Do you want someone you cannot have?
More than words could express.

48. Have you ever played an instrument before?
Yeah.

49. What was the worst idea you had this week?
Being a robber?

50. What were you doing last night at 11 pm?
Sniffing.

51. Are you happy with your love life right now?
I don't have a love life. So, yeah.

52. What song best describes your love life?
I don't have a love life. So, yeah.

53. Does that person know that you like him/ her?
You know, kan?

54. Who makes you laugh the most?
My close friends.

55. Do you speak other languages than english?
Yeap. Quite a lot.

56. Favourite websites?
www.ahymnoflove.blogspot.com
:D.

57. What's your middle name?
Bryan or Sim or Zu.
It depends on how well you know my name.

58. What are you doing tomorrow?
Movie @ Mid Valley.

59. What do you think you're like?
Failure shit.

60. Who will you choose to die with?
Happiness and satisfaction of knowing I had enough fun in life.

61. Where have you been today?
School, Nathan's Corner and home.

62. What game do play often?
Pool online.

63. Who are you missing now?
Donald Westwood.

64. If you had to choose between a friend and someone you love, who would you choose?
Myself and God. :D.

65. What are you doing right now?
Feeling guilty for my a-hole results.

66. Which primary school were you from?
SRJK (C) Shang Wu, Pembroke School, SJK (C) Kuen Cheng 2.

67. Name 3 colours that you like.
Green, white and blue.

68. What emotions would you like to express?
:'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((.

69. What is life to you?
Dream?

70. If you had something troubling you, what would you do?
I'll just screw it.

71. Who did you last chat on Msn with?
Belinda!

72. Who do you admire most?
Jesus.

73. In what month were you born in?
March.

74. How are you feeling now?
Guilty.

75. What time is it now?
5:10 pm.

76. What do you think of the person that tagged you?
Her China hair style! HAHAAA!

77. What colour have you dyed your hair into?
I have virgin hair.

78. Why are you doing this quiz?
Cause nothing interesting is happening. And that leads me to bored-ness.

79. What do you do when you're moody?
Call Yee Sim.

80. At what age do you wish to get married?
27- 29.

81. Who is the most important person to you in your life?
God.

82. If today was your last day, what would you do?
I'd shout "I LOVE EVERYONE OF YOU WHO ONCE EXISTED IN MY LIFE. AND THANKS FOR MAKING A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE!".

83. Who is the person you trust the most?
Yee Sim.

84. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Oh. Rainbow still exists?

85. If you had a dream come true, what would it be?
World peace. HAHAHA! Nah! Make you mine?

86. What is your goal for this year?
Top 10 in class, at least 5 summons for driving without license, stop all my bad habits and make more out of life. :)

87. Do you believe in love that lasts for eternity?
Not anymore. But, I wanna believe again.

88. What feeling do you love the most?
The feeling of you telling me you love me.

89. Do you think the world is under global warming right now?
Beyond obvious.

90. What feeling do you hate the most?
Assurance of knowing you'll never get something.

91. Do you cherish every single relationship you have now?
Yeah. I do.

92. Do you believe in God?
Everyday!

93. Who cares for you the most?
My family members and my close friends.

94. What do you think is the most important thing you have now?
Dunhill? Nothing is no longer important to me, honestly.

95. What would you bring with you to a fight?
My heart.

96. What have you done that you are still regretting in your life?
Sending that text message. And for not studying during exams.

97. What would you feel like if no one would care for you anymore?
Er.. Sad? I don't know. Never felt that before.

98. What if you boyfriend/ girlfriend two-timmed you?
Forgive and forget. :). Nobody's perfect, right?

99. How do you feel now?
Cool.

100. (Melanie dear, you have missed out a questions I am certain).

One day. But I'm always here if you ever need me.

2009-03-24T17:30:00.004+08:00

Secondhand Serenade - Stranger.
Play count in my iTunes : 274 times.

I'll know one day, someday, at any time given, if you'll ever be there waiting for me..

Love is a medicine
for any kind of wound,
but there is no medicine
found in the world
for a wound given by love.
True?

Yes, words. You have all of 'em, you have it all.

2009-03-23T17:40:00.008+08:00

Had a Belinda's theory conversation last night :
I'll just cut it to the main point.

ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
are you ok? -____-* what wron steps?
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
*wrong
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
No la.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Go read my blog la.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I uploaded pictures already.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
yeah read
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
:D
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
nice entry
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Brb. Toilet.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Okay.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Back.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
ya
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
your blog so emoooo
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Emo?
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
lol yeah
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
like ... err you knowwwwwwwwww
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
so loving
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
lol
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Lol.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
No la.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Wtf.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
OKAY GREAT u just wrote it in your pm
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
i;m just goonna shut up then
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
-__-*
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I kinda got rejected by my crush last night.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
So yeah.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
It kinda hurts.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I'm in love dilemma. That's all I can say.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
erm okay
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
can i give some comments?
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Sure.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Ooi!
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Why so long one your comment?
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
i will just say i have never date people BUT that doesnt mean i'm immature la. lololol ok la the whole point is i think if you are ready to confess, you must always be ready to accept what's people decision. yeah it sure hurts when people reject you but nothing in life goes your just the way you like it.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
true enough?
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
YES!
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
OMG.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
great
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
THANKS, WEI!
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
there's nothing to be sad about la...
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
OMG.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
just have to go on with your life
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I think I'm gonna blog about it.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
take it as an experience la
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
pray about it
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Thank you, sakai.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
You pray for me too la.
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
God will show you your soulmate or watever la
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
dont wory so much
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
Thank you wei!
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
yeah sure.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
I didn't know sakai would say something like that.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
:D:D.
Marcus Bryan Sim. says:
HAHAA!
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
WHAT LAAA
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
i aint sakai
ღ [† §hÌñ!wè¡ †] ㋡ ☻ says:
i'm a matured GOOD GIRL
XD

OMG! HOW TRUE CAN THAT BE?!

And I wonder did Belinda taught every human being that same theory! Hahaaa.

Oh.
I've got myself 2 new addictions.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present you :

*blink blink blink*
:D:D:D:D:D.

Better than any cigarettes in the whole freaking wide world.

*Just in case you don't know what's that. Those are only pencils made from wood. You'll have to sharpen it to use it.

And one more.
Sniffing crack :

Just lose your self from all aches.
Be blur, don't stay awake. Cause reality just hurts..

I'm so looking forward to get my surat gantung sekolah.
So, that I can have another 2 weeks of holidays. YES, MAN! :D:D:D:D:D.
So, PLEASE FREAKING GIVE ME! I WANT!

Oh. By the way, happy birthday Sarah Martin!
Hope you are doing great in Australia!

And I miss you guys. =(.

ILTS @ Pudu Girls.

2009-03-22T18:44:00.041+08:00

Yee Sim, it was a wrong move.
I shouldn't have sent it.
But I did it. I actually did it. And I've never felt so empty in my life before.

It was seriously a wrong time for me cause I was supposed to sleep early and wake up by 5 today.
But how the heck am I going to bed after knowing that somethings in life don't go the way you like. It's like geez, man! =S.

So, I guess I will just stop pretending that you will fall in love with me.

Ps : Belinda Ong! If you are reading this. THANK YOU for the lesson. I'm so grateful to you right now.

So, an hour of sleep was all I had.
Woke up at 4. Mind was totally blanked. And I was actually planning not to go for ILTS.
Somehow I had this once in a blue moon feeling.
It just can't be explained by any words or any action.
It's somehow an assurance of knowing you'll never have something.

So, woke up. Shower. Breakfast. And headed for Sri Petaling's LRT Station by 7:10 am.
ILTS was as usual - boring. Wanted to sneak out half way with Chun Yew like I did last year but somehow, something told me to stay back. And I didn't regret making that decision.

After ILTS, headed to Starbucks @ Times Square with Bill, Shin Wei, Michelle Hor and Bala.
Crap-ed a lot. Laughed like hell. And I did enjoyed much.
We are all foreigners here in Malaysia as an exchange student.

Our origin :
I'm from Australia.
Bill's from Nepal.
Shin Wei's from China.
Michelle Hor's from Korea.
Bala's from India.

I had an awesome hang out with them.
Bill was the usual joker.
And Shin Wei went so fucking high. Hahaaa!
Gila siao wei! People in Starbucks were like staring at our laughs.

Headed home and here I am now blogging.
And the best part was my mom came back home!

Here goes pictures :

Pandu Girls.

My cow. Moooooo. HAHAAA!
Michelle Hor.
Bala.
Oh. She loves me.
My Interact president - Michelle Lok.
Group picture.
The porn freak guy - Bill. I look gay.
The orang gila - Shin Wei.
Chun Yew.
Junior Koh.
My cow and Junior.
Shin Wei somehow had some issues with Rubik's cube.

Oh. We won 2 prizes by the way.

Best finance management.
And Best Community Service project.
Ka Heng. Also known as the camera man.
The humans who contributed - Ching and Rab.
This picture was supposed to only have me in it.
Then from out of nowhere, these 2 hooligans run in.
=D.
Be proud.
And show off. Hahaa. :D.
The bitch.
Brothers from different mothers.
We are the hooligans. :D.

Then Starbucks :

I wasn't prepared.
She was all high up, man.

He wanted to check whether his eyes were red.
And all I can say is "STOP WATCHING PORN, YOU IDIOT!".

One of the best day in my life.

Nothing hurts more when you can actually feel your heart breaking into pieces.

But no worries, I'll be fine.
I hope I will..
Why is it so hard to accept that there will never be anything more than friends? Is it because you are too good for me? Or is it because I don't deserve you? Or is it because it was never meant to be?

='(((((!

Loose feeling? End up very bad? Hurt me? I really don't care! I still want you!

2009-03-19T12:43:00.005+08:00

I know you're scared.
And thank you for you being so considerate by not wanting to hurt me.
All I'm gonna say is I really don't care and I really don't mind!
Love is always worth the risk until you get your heart broken.

Love = pain.

But I can promise you with my life that you won't get a single cut.

Sometimes, I wonder isn't it just God's law that as soon as I think I've found a love that's new, there's always something or someone to prove me wrong?

God, I know I've always been successful in everything I touch.
Thank you for that. But it is possible for you to let me fail in everything but gain only in love?
I beg you? Please?

I love you, Carmen Lee Kharr Yann!

I'll put your name in circles. Cause a circle goes on forever.

2009-03-18T22:26:00.002+08:00

I must confess that Mid Valley is really my second home.
Was there since last Friday till today.

Holidays are bored.

And a big thank you to you guys for the wishes.

Will upload some pictures tomorrow.

Goodnight. :D

You asked me why am I going to bed so early. And the truth is I am sick of staying up late thinking of you every second as long as I'm awake. I just want a few hours of sleep. And I'll continue thinking about you when I wake up.

I'll be - Edwin McCain.

2009-03-15T10:11:00.005+08:00

The strands in your eyes
That color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
And emeralds from mountains
Thrust towards the sky
Never revealing their depth

And tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated; I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache
That hangs from above

I'll be your crying shoulder
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

Rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
And you're my survival
You're my living proof
My love is alive and not dead

And tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated; I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache
That hangs from above

I'll be your crying shoulder
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

And I've dropped out, I've burned up
I fought my way back from the dead
Tuned in, turned on
Remembered the thing that you said

I'll be your crying shoulder
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

I'll be your crying shoulder
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

Stop me and steal my breath.

2009-03-14T11:04:00.007+08:00

First of all, exams's over.
Went home immediately after physics exam yesterday.
Then got myself changed, and headed for my previous school - SMK Taman Desa.
Zhu Xin wanted to go, so I accompanied him.
Met up with a lot of mates.
And went back to school for Scripture Union meeting.
After meeting, walked to the park with Lydia, Melvin and Keerthi.
Meet up with Francis, Spenser and a few of them.
Just hanging there.

Went home at 6pm.
It was so freaking hard to find a cab.

After reaching home, went to Gardens with Bill and his dad for dinner.
And watched Slumdog Millionair.
Reached home at 12.
Played hard.
Sleep.

Jo-Lynn.
Spot the discipline teacher behind. My phone nearly got confiscated.

Melvin.
Melvin & Lydia.

假装多好我只要

It’s good to pretend, I only want.
只想要再拥有一秒
I only wish to have you once again for another second.
去相信你的拥抱
To be able to trust in your embrace.
一直会让我依靠
And always let me depend on.
继续等待还心甘情愿的不想逃
I am willing to wait for you and not to ever run away.

一直到现在我才发现
爱你跟不爱你都是不能假装的..

Oh, anyone going for iPhone launching event?

Tagged.

2009-03-12T16:30:00.005+08:00

For fun la since I don't wanna study physics.

I am tagged by my lovely girlfriend, Pei Hui.

1. Take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture right now.
2. Don't change your clothes, just take a picture.
3. Post the picture with NO editing.
4. Post the picture with these instructions.

1. What's your ambition?

Er.. Superman? Nah. Pilot.

2. What do you like the most about the person who tagged you?

Her Malaysian-wannabe. :D. Go back to Korea la!

3. Are you looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend?

Er. Yeah. But, not that desperate.

4. Do you think you have enough confidence?

It depends on the situation.

5. How many babies you want?

Just 2.

6. What would you name your kids in the future?

Female = Abigail Sarah Sim.
Male = Akingson Jaelin Sim.

7. What is your goal for this year (2009)?

Get an A for add math, give my first kiss away, get at least 5 summons for driving without license.

8. Do you think you are clever?

It depends on the situation.

9. What are you favorite colours?

Green, white, yellow, blue and black.

10. Do you ever wonder where you would end up after you die?

It's either heaven or hell.
Obviously, I want to go to heaven.

11. What are you bad habits?

Stressing myself up.

12. If you can do anything now. What would it be?

Turn back time and change my past.

13. State a random fact about yourself?

Er. I sleep 3 hours a day?

14. What does flying means to you.

A symbol of freedom and stress-free.

15. What do you crave for the most currently?

To be with you.

16. What do you mean if you were to fall in love?

It means that I am offering the best of me and the worst of me. Only for that special someone to destroy what was left of me.

17. Are you currently single?

Precisely yes.

18. How many ex boyfriend/girlfriend you had before?

For serious shit, 2.
For passing time, uncountable. :D

19. Do you believe in fate?

Nope. I believe in God's plan.

20. Die a virgin?

YEAH. I would love to. :D

Instructions :

-Remove one question from above and add in your personal question.

-Make a total of 20 questions and tag 5 people.

-Notify them in their chatbox that they've been tagged.

-List them out at the end of the post.

People I tag :

E-Lynn.

Joanna Lim.

Karin Chong.

Melanie.

Vi Chien.

Deep shit.

2009-03-11T16:28:00.002+08:00

I screwed up my accounts and chemistry paper.
100%, no, 200% assurance of failing 'em.
Hard shit.
Add math's tomorrow.
Sigh.

And I don't know why I am starting to hate Malaysia.
Mom, I want to go back to Oz.
:(

Oh, and it's raining, again.
It's kinda hard thing to find rainbow in Kuala Lumpur even though my house overlooks the whole city.
Or maybe it's because rainbow doesn't exist anymore?

I just want to be with you as soon as possible.
Even though I know you are unprepared. And I know you think it's a little crazy.
But isn't this the way how love goes?
Insane, reckless and senseless..

Shoutout.

2009-03-10T18:27:00.008+08:00

Happy birthday Melanie Lim!
Hahaaaa. I know I am always the winner. :D

And I just realized that I don't have a picture with you.
So, it's all gonna be in the full text version.

Know you since I was in primary.
You are quite a cool friend la. Someone who knows almost all of my past.

Ps : A birthday is just the first day of another 356-day around the sun. Enjoy the trip.

And good luck in your add math, eh!
8 over 100 ain't a good thing, girl. HAHAAHA!
Oh! Talking about add math.
I've got feedback from quite a few schools regarding their add math's result.
The lowest I heard, 2 marks. Low Ji Hong.

I will do better than you people.
:p

Reminiscing.

2009-03-08T17:48:00.004+08:00

Random.
I'm bored of facing the text book so here I am.

Learning Secret Valentine's piano version.

Ciao.

Bad luck.

2009-03-07T14:48:00.008+08:00

Man.
It's so not my week.

Wed - had to cancel off a hangout with someone.
Thurs - Add math tuition teacher found out that Henry smokes. So, I might too, get in trouble.
Fri - Went home at freaking 9 pm. Thanks to my mom.
Sat - Got blamed by teacher for cheating my Moral paper. I am innocent, you cunt! Thanks to some dumb-fuc-hole-king for hiding the moral values paper in the toilet.

So, what's bad gonna happen tomorrow? I am so looking forward.

What the fuck is wrong with this week, man!
Fish it!

I'll pray for a better week ahead.

Hetic day.

2009-03-06T21:39:00.012+08:00

Oh, cool. Thanks to the bitch for fetching me home at 9 :20 pm.
It's my first time in 2009 wearing school uniform from 6 am to 9 :20 pm.
_|_ mom.
I won't mind if you have no brain. But fuck you for not using your brain!

Anyways, went to Bill's house with Celia after class today for physics tuition class.
Quite an awesome day. :D
Had fun with the two of them.
Did some chemistry revision.

And my physics tuition teacher..
At my first glance, I thought he would suck.
But, in life, never under estimate a retarded person on a wheel chair.
He has his own college. I went speechless after he told me that.

Pictures :

The 2 of them.

Oh, it's exam fever this week.
And guess what came out for BM and English essay?

Click in to see (iii).
And question 5.

*speechless.

How much more do I have to tell you I love you before you know it is actually killing me inside?

2009-03-05T18:33:00.008+08:00

Random pictures :

I still don't feel good.
:'(

I miss you.
Love sick? Must be.

And I miss the people in following picture like fucking much.

Me, Fatty, Hui Shin.
Take care in Australia, you fucking cunt!
Don't be so emo, man!

Form 3 is like one of the best year in my life.

I hate this part.

2009-03-04T14:28:00.003+08:00

Screw it. Fuck it.
Yeah. I fucked up something that is so important to me.
I feel so fucking guilty as if I've killed someone.

I'm so sorry, Carmen.

Mom, if I still have the ability like I did, I will show you 2 of my middle fingers and walk straight out of the house, again.

I'm closing down all my connections within all human beings.
I feel really fucked up.
I'm no longer using my cell phone and computer after this.

In case of emergency, ring my house.

Ps: Wei Sen, if you are reading this. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE come to school! I know you are having problems with your boyfriend. But, hey! No one is worth your tears and the one who is, won't make you cry. If you need somebody to talk to, just come to school. We are always here for you. Cheer up, alright mate?

*suicide - self destruction.

My new toy.

2009-02-28T23:24:00.014+08:00

First of all. I wanna say that..

I LOVE MY DADDY FREAKING MUCH!
He is the best guy in this world.

I have got new speaker from him!
By Sony Ericsson.
The volume is louder than my computer's speakers.
How cool's this?
Bye, the old ones.
:D.

I LOVE YOU DADDY!

Adorable.

2009-02-27T13:55:00.002+08:00

My baby.

He told me he wants to learn fencing.

Leave.

2009-02-26T16:28:00.004+08:00

"It is not that I have stopped loving you because you are always on my mind. It is just that I have come to realize that there is totally no hope for you and I."

So, I 'ma walk on with my life..
And tell you goodbye!

Credits to Wei-Jan for the picture.

It is the best sport ever.

2009-02-25T15:19:00.001+08:00

http://www.fencing4all.com/

And if it's a hero you want I can save you.

2009-02-22T20:28:00.002+08:00

My weekend sucked.

:(

Wanted to go tennis with daddy but it was raining.
Wanted to go play pool but I got grounded.
Wanted to use the computer but my mom doesn't allow.

Skipped church thanks to my parents for not waking me up.
In result, I woke up at 12 noon.

Then I slept back at 5pm. Woke up at 6, went for dinner at Ampang with my granny.

-The end.

Flying kites.

2009-02-19T16:23:00.006+08:00

Yes! Flying kites seem popular nowadays.
I even saw a few Malay kids flying kites in the lane behind their houses yesterday.
It all started from Bill.
OOI! Kite party!
:D HAHAHAAAA!
I started looking through my cupboard for my 6 years old kite.
It was good as a new kite. Thanks, daddy for keeping it in such a good condition.

Going for tennis now.
Later, mates.

Guts.

2009-02-18T15:52:00.007+08:00

So, let's rewind.

Last Saturday :
My valentine's day sucked.
Oh yeah, happy belated valentine's day to you couples out there!
Celebrated being single by going to the same place, doing the same thing with the same mates.
Was there from 1 pm to 11 ++ pm.
Got grounded by my mom for reaching home at 12.

"No more pool! You are SO addictive to it. Use your brain and think about it! You have crossed the line!" said mom.

Ps : I wished I had the guts to talk to you.

Sunday :
Went for RRI games held by Interact in Victoria Institute.
Had fun under the sun form 8 am to 1 pm.
After the games ended, I did some photo shots for Wei Jan since she needed it for her project.
Man. Being a model for a photo shots is quite an interesting thing to do.
We did those photo shots from place to place.
First at Pavilion, then KLCC and Times Square.
It is kinda embarrassing being a model in public cause people do stare at you.

Will upload those pictures when I get 'em from Wei Jan.
Man, I want her DSLR.

Ps : JAN! YOU ARE FREAKING GOOD, WEI!

The Bryans.

Ciao.

Your ride, best trip.

Birthdays.

Tonight.

The stars are holding you tonight.

The girl.

Pick me up.

It tears me up inside to see you.

Dear Maria.

Bleed.

Ocala.

Marijuana.

Joints, baby!

One request - love me back.

Joint.

Sometimes a goodbye is a painful way to say "I love you".

I’m slowly getting closure.

Everything that matters breaks in two.

Respect boundaries.

Tagged.

Glue and prayer.

Sigh of relief.

Cause the truths always hurt.

Credits.

Perhaps.

Tagged.

Even "fuck" wouldn't describe how I feel.

Comptines d'un autre été.

Bottles.

Lost Generation.

Wanna know how to kill me? Tell me that you don't love me.

Liberty!

Cause there will never be an "us".

Tu me manques.

I'm for you; but you're just not for me.

Loving someone you can't be with.

I'm not living this life.

Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.

It's just not me anymore.

1 week.

Mom.

You! Yes, you!

Will we be always, always?

I'm slipping off the edge.

Tagged.

Smile for May 04, 2009.

Love truth, and pardon error.

I have loved life.

It won't be soon before long.

I’ve lick my wounds but I can't ever see 'em getting better.

My heartstrings.

Just leave me.

And the one thing I learned from you is.. love hurts.

Don't take your love away, please.

Clky.

Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over. I wish that I could take it back. But it's over.

So, the stroy goes.

Because I know my words so you can keep that drama I don't want it anymore.

Song Xian Wern.

Because some secrets are meant to be shared.

Sometimes, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairytale to tell.

Joke only for true Malaysians.

When you've reached the end, what else is there?

I'm falling more for you, baby. More.

My body moves but my heart will stay.

Consuming fire fan into flame. A passion for Your name.

Drinking.

Scream "die Shady" and pop it.

I love although I fear.

I walked around with a limp. Cause loving you almost killed me.

A guiltless twisted lie. It made me learn to hate myself for letting it pass by.

Goodbye? Hello? Isn't it just the same cause in the end, I'm still gonna go back to you.

The killer © Yee Sim.

While you have your agenda, a life to pursue.

Someone's big day.

ily, clky. I still do!

For fuck's sake.

Tagged.

One day. But I'm always here if you ever need me.